Indie bhaashi

Living away from where I had lived for a couple of decades has helped me realize the pros of knowing more than one language. Part of the reason why I have felt less alien than expected is that the locals here speak the same language that I have been taught for more than a decade. Migrating to a country that speaks a different language can be hard for some and enjoyable for others. An interesting incident that comes to my mind is that of an Indian friend in Germany being forced to shadow an 'Indian-looking' family so that he could get to the nearest Indian store. 'I will make do without learning German till as long as I possibly can!', he remarked. Six months later, he has found his way to a German class. Seems like all Indian-looking families in this guy's town have sorted him out!

In India, there is a new language every few hundreds of square kilometres or less and each language has its fair share of dialects. Indian cities bear witness to a massive confluence of languages, and this brings along a vibrant mix of cultures, festivals and tradition. Be it jumpy Punjabi or melodious Malayalam, every language has an earthy ring to it. Probably the best way to learn a language is to spend some time in the host state, or mix with people from that state in your city. I can say this from first hand experience of experiencing the city of joy and its language sitting miles away in New Delhi. Knowing a little bit of a language can also help a great deal when you visit the host state. Try cracking an expression in the local language - its the best way to endear yourself to the locals.

The cities of India make for an interesting experience, often forgotten in the mad race of living to earn a living and nothing else.

Ghoos gaatha - a shameful trilogy

My first encounter with 'ghoos' (hindi for bribe) happened way back in 2002 when my elder brother applied for a passport so that he could pursue higher studies abroad. The two cops who came on behalf of civil vigilance authorities spent an hour talking about random things with my simpleton parents before laying out the inevitable. My parents always expected it to come up, but the figure of eight thousand rupees that was demanded was shocking for those days, indeed, as for today. The apparent reason for the 'hike' in the 'charges for their services' being that my brother had claimed that he was a resident of Uttar Pradesh, where our house was, while he stayed in his institute's hostel in New Delhi (a mere hour's drive from home). My parents, both innocent souls who have worked through their lives with nothing but sincerity and truthfulness, had no clue about how to respond.

To cut a long story short, a street smart detective uncle intervened and we had the same cop calling us and chiding us for taking things 'too seriously'.

Five years hence, yours truly decided it was good time to get his passport. It was different this time, in that I was determined not to give a single paisa to the saamp or bichchu (snake or scorpion - local slang for the cheap, corrupt cop on the streets) or whoever comes to verify my identity. Luckily, my father was away when the cop graced my home. He must have deemed it unfit to ask money from my mother and wanted my dad to call him up. He also made some petty excuse about my application missing a photograph, which was a blatant lie. Anyway, the apparently missing photo was duly handed over to him as I trekked to the nearby police thana (station). His searching eyes found nothing green in my hands, so he remarked 'Aur kuchch nahin hai kya? (Don't you have anything more than this?'. I shook my head firmly, with a slight smile inside as I walked back. For some reason, I was more happy about not shelling out a single extra rupee rather than anxious about whether I would get my passport or not. Two months later, the Right to Information Act kicked in and my passport came home, without a single paisa of ghoos. What was most hilarious was the postman asking for money, because someone in the family would go abroad and bring back millions of rupees!

Completing the trilogy of the ghoos gaatha (tales of bribes), my parents had to go through the same ordeal a couple of weeks ago. They staunchly refused to pay any so-called 'service charges'. A couple of months will reveal whether they get their passports or not. What was most heart wrenching was to hear how a cop remarked, while accepting bribe from another passport applicant, 'Ab toh Gandhiji aa gaye hai naa, sab kaam ho jaayega. (Now that Gandhiji has arrived, all work will be done)'.

Public apathy has proven to be a blood sucker for our country. Amongst all talk of India shining into the twenty first century as the next global power, let the current generation of India's human resources work to drive the ghoos menace out of our lives.

Another reminder from our politicos

The last week saw Indian polity taking yet another plunge into its darkest pothole, made increasingly deeper with each ugly incident over the past few decades. Far from acknowledging their uncouth and shameful conduct, the suspended Rajya Sabha members protested outside the Parliament, much like kids do when rapped on the knuckles for not behaving properly. The adjoining photo shows a gross misuse of Gandhi's statue. It also illustrates the extent to which our politicians have fallen over the years. The common man / woman has come to accept unruly politicians as a given. With all this talk of a young, vibrant India doing the rounds, I feel it is time we youths sat up, took notice and acted on such stark reminders of our nation's current state of advanced decay.

Let the mild, respectful conduct not be limited only to placed of worship, learning and our homes. Let our generation be led by committed, genuine leaders to its rightful glorious future.

Field Hockey World Cup, New Delhi'10 - Post 2

We are deep into the Hockey World Cup, standing at the doorstep of the knockout stage. As expected, the Asian teams, barring Korea, have underperformed; being beaten by lesser rated teams that managed to perform cohesively. The home team has been humbled in its previous two matches by Australia and Spain, two teams that it used to match stick for stick a decade ago. As this blog is being written, it plays England, for pride and happy memories.

From the looks, the round robin stage seems to have done justice to itself by sifting through the teams, giving a pool of teams that go into the next stage with almost equal honours. Individual brilliance has been unable to leave its mark so far, with the indomitable Pakistani drag flicker Sohail Abbas conceding that his team and himself did not perform well enough to make a difference. While Korea and Australia relied on their fast paced game and spontaneous counter attacks, teams like England have set up their goals beautifully.

The venue has lived up to its hype and the game's demands. It also seems like the tourney is a hit among the locals, which is a good sign for the game in a country forever crazy about the other gentleman's game.

Field Hockey World Cup, New Delhi'10 - Post 1

The Hockey World Cup is here! New Delhi seems to have come up with a state of the art hockey field, replete with dug outs, swanky lcd displays, comfortable seating and a slick playing turf. A recent Bollywood movie that glorified the sport and the said stadium is still fresh in memory, although it is said that one needs a movie to popularise any sport. Having said that, any new lease of life to field hockey in India is welcome, keeping in mind the abyss into which our sport has plunged over the last couple of decades. Failing to qualify for the Olympics in 2008 was the final nail in the coffin. Indian hockey has suffered from poor administration and press coverage and it must take a cue from its cricketing counterparts. I still don't understand why or how the cricketing fever caught the minds and hearts of the blue billion. But I shall leave that for another post.

As I write, Spain has been pressurized and made to overwork by minnows South Africa. The Olympic silver medalists finally huffed and puffed their way to a 4 -2 win. The much-touted Aussies were shocked by arch rivals England in what is arguable the second best rivalry in any sport across the planet. Completing the dream opening day of this year's World Cup, India and Pakistan are scooping it out with the former enjoying a 3 - 0 lead with 16 minutes to go for the hooter. Pakistan have, undoubtedly, had the final laugh in field hockey, including a recent 6 -3 drubbing in Salta, Argentina. With some legendary players like Rehan Butt, Dilawar Hussain and the trump card Sohail Abbas, they definitely look the better team on paper. India, on the other hand, seems to be a motley group of proven performers and bright youngsters, though the lack of dazzling talents like a Dhanraj Pillay or a Jugraj Singh is too evident to miss. It also has a remarkable tendency to choke in the dying minutes of any game and give away the lead. The next fifteen minutes would tell.

Thousands of miles away, another keen tussle is on cards this evening. The USA plays Canada to decide who takes the gold and comes up on top in a cross border tussle for supremacy in the final of the Winter Olympics Ice Hockey.

And the two hours break means that I can also write about India's 'Holi' 4-1 win. Hmm... the people are quiet, at least for now.

I got this in a forward and couldn't resist uploading it here. This piece conveys exactly what I am starting to realise.

Awesome Saturday Part II

'3 Idiots' has been making waves back home. And having just finished a couple of years in a place that made me feel like an idiot more often than not, I could relate to the idea a lot. Also, this was going to be my first desi movie in ages. With such awesome friends to boot, a great afternoon was in store.

I liked the movie for the scene following the examination, the crazy bathroom dance sequence, the beautiful locales of Leh and Laddakh (I still suspect some of the scence were shot outside India, but I am pretty sure I am wrong, the hills of India are a treat to the eyes) and for some well timed humour. However, I was expecting a classic Raju Hirani comic product but came out a tad disappointed. The movie was light hearted and did make for a nice outing. But it was too predictable, some jokes were stale, and the ending was just out of the Great Cook Book of Bollywood. As our post-movie dissection concluded, we also agreed that a lot of issues, deeds and attitudes were projected unrealistically. I can't see how a totally vella dude can top all the exams. I was vella yes.. and no, I never topped the exams (far from it, ahem! ... but that's got be another story). Nice one overall, but I still can't understand the super duper hit status that it has been awarded back home.

The icing on my awesome Saturday was the potluck following the movie. Masala dosa, Sambhar, dal, rotis, cake and gooseberry pie, with ice cream made for a mouthwatering feast. Strangers became friends over food and by the end of countless rounds of mafia, everyone seemed to have known everyone else for ages.

The desi gang in Oak tree is getting closer with each bite!

Cat in the basket

I have known this story for quite some time, but my brother put it the way it is in the title in an email, and I thought I should post it here.

This is one of the ways by which a practise becomes a belief and eventually a superstition.

Many moons ago, a pious, God-fearing family lived in India. They used to perform a pooja (Hindi for prayer) every morning so as to appease the Gods. Lamps were lit, songs sung and delicacies offered The offerings consisted of fruits, sweets and a glass of milk (for some strange reason, every God eats and drinks sumptuously!). Only after the pooja was over would the family eat its first morsel for the day.

The house also had a pet cat. Being apparently less devotional, the cat would sneak up to the pooja and lick a few drops of milk from the container. Once this was discovered, the family used to keep the cat covered with a basket, so that it did not interfere in the prayers.

Years passed, the cat ran away, the kids became young men and women, the parents grew old and died, but the prayers continued. Now, the kids had always known that 'a cat was kept covered under a basket' during the pooja. So, every time a pooja was scheduled they would go to the pet shop, rent out a cat for a day, bring it home, cover it with a basket and then start their pooja. The cat in the basket became an inseparable component of the pooja. No cat in the basket? Whaaaat! The Gods are gonna get angry... so went the notion.

And thus, a reasonable practise became a superstition.

Undergrads in IISc starting 2011

The Indian Institute of Science (IISc) has announced that it shall start accepting undergraduates for admission to its four year Bachelor of Science program in 2011. The issue was under consideration for a couple of years until it was accepted by the committee responsible for it.

Tata Institute, as it is locally known, has always occupied a niche in higher learning in India. It caught the fancy of many European researchers when India was still a British colony and was spoken of in high regard in scientific circles. Morris Travers, the first director of the Institute, famously said," There is nothing like it in India, and nothing better in Great Britain". Over the years, the Institute has maintained its high standards of research and charted new research areas as well.

The question of introducing undergraduate learning was a quintessential one, given the possible advantages that could be enjoyed by the Institute and its students. The former would benefit from a continuous feed of science students for its Masters and Doctoral programs. The students, fortunate enough to study at IISc, would also enjoy a stimulating atmosphere surrounded by people breathing science.

Prof P Balaram, the current director of IISc, paid a visit to my Masters school - IIT Delhi, a few months ago. In his interview with CHEMCOS, the science magazine at IITD; he clearly mentions the conflicting opinions within the Institute about the idea of opening its gates for undergraduate classes.

It is interesting to hear this for a couple of reasons. One, IISc has always been a supporter of undergraduate learning in science. It offers scholarships like the Kishore Vaigyanik Protsahan Yojna (KVPY) and fellowships for summer research. Each year, hundreds of undergrads get a taste of research at the highest level and many go on to pursue careers in science. Therefore, the institute has been shaping young minds for decades. Secondly, any scientific endeavour requires a steady influx of young talent. The IISc is no exception. On many occasions, I have heard professors lamenting about the dampening of scientific enthusiasm among kinds across the planet. The best way to tackle this problem would be to start a serious undergrad program on its own campus.

One possible reason for the apprehension in IISc's approach could be the lack of qualified teachers and infrastructure. There is absolutely no doubt about the research capabilities of the Institute. However, undergraduate teaching is a completely different ball game. Most of the students have very little idea of what they have jumped into and they need proper guidance at this stage of their careers. A lot of adjustment is warranted on the part of researchers so as to address such issues. They are used to solving research problems and working with graduate stduents who are more serious about their work. Undergrads can be a differnet ball game altogether. Also, the existing infrastructure is only enough to keep the Institute up and running. An influx of undergrads would require huge investments.

The idea seems really lucrative and, on a personal note, I am eagerly looking forward to see how things shape up. I have always felt that a two year Masters program in chemistry and physics would have worked really well at IISc because the teaching and laboratory resources have for such courses are already present. If handled carefully, this program could work wonders for Indian science.

Blanked out

These two words do a pretty good job of describing my state before I started writing this post. I am taking a small digression from the recent trend of writing about my experiences and, instead, will attempt to uncover a few issues that I read in an article (published in a leading Indian magazine a few years ago) a few moments ago. I strongly urge you to read this article before proceeding any further, so as to understand the points made by me.

The article starts rather promisingly, describing some general notions about IITians. For the uninitiated, IIT stands for the Indian Institute of Technology, a network of Engineering and Science Schools across India that seems to have gained substantial repute for the 'quality' of students churned out each year. The article then moves on to muse on whether the IITs have served the purpose with which Jawaharlal Nehru, the first Prime Minister of free India, envisioned these institutes. All seemed good and I thought I had come across a frank, sugar-free, no-holds-barred view on the ghettos of academic India.

What followed was a shocking self-contradictory diversion into a needless ego trip about how IITians are great and how everything about them is even greater. Passing an examination is equated with academic excellence, which makes me question the very meaning of learning that the honourable author seems to have committed to memory in high school. With colleagues as 'extraordinary' as the author claims he had, I am sure something went wrong later, given the nature of personalities romanticised.

There are simply too many instances to be taken apart and trashed. In fact, I am yet to catch hold of a better example of the narrow, ignorant viewpoints that I came across on multiple occasions during my student days at IIT. In the interest of space and time, I shall limit myself to a only a few more absurd statements made in the article.

IITians are proclaimed as being 'the chosen' ones. I am extremely interested in meeting the 'choosers'. Why did they choose what they chose, and what did they choose them for - tagging them away to farcicial lives, elevating them on the materialistic scale to seats of authority, voice and power (where such ludicrous articles could come from). IITians have also been said to graduate with 'tribal loyalties'. I am sure our respected tribals are better mannered, more cultured and have clearer perpectives in life. And what loyalties are being spoken about here, when cases of students littering their own campuses, cheating in examinations, and abusing faculty members are too many to be quoted.

The article concludes with shocking examples of immodesty, ignorance, pomposity and superiority complex.

It is unfortunate that such narrow minded views are expressed on a public forum. I can only hope that the IITians sharing similar views are a minority.

Gandhi quote

'Be the change that you wish to see in the world' - Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi

One of his quotes that is really popular in the U.S.

What is India?

'You guys don't care too much about time, do you?', asked a friend, today. For a moment, I was taken aback, not knowing if an accusation was implied . I was relieved when he went on to tell me about one of his professors who had spent some time in India and had come back with such stories. I don't remember how I answered his query, must have mumbled something about generalisations not holding good in India. What then, is the truth of India?

I went to the city library earlier this week and found a full section on books on India and Indians. (What was more surprising was to find another section on Pakistan sitting right next to the Indian one. At least the books seem to coexist peacefully.) Every other author seems to have mastered the knowledge of the history of India. Yet, most Indians seem to have a naive and narrow view of our own country, giving more importance to petty issues like religion, money, movies and cricket than literacy, ethics, pollution - issues that require far more attention.

Shashi Tharoor puts it rather eloquently in one of his books that India is an entity greater than the sum of its parts (playing with words comes naturally to him, albeit at some cost). 'My friend is going to India on a month long project. She wants to see the 'real' India', quipped a friend some days ago. I then had the tough job of first figuring out what the 'real' India is, and then guiding my friend's friend towards it. I was lectured upon the reality of education in India by my roommate. 'Indians have to study for a job, dude. What's the use of research when it has no applications? You can't survive in India, dude.' I choose to postpone my comments on this. Such illustrious views deserve being trashed separately.

What then is the one thing that is true for every part of India or every Indian? Is there such a thing at all? I am struggling to come up with an answer myself, more so from a place that is another huge melting pot. Here, some Indians seem to take pride in speaking Hindi, Tamil, etc in public. Others trash everything that has enabled them to reach here, and take to all things American like ducks to water. Still others choose to play safe, pretending ignorance of issues other than their chosen areas of work.

Politics is an issue of enormous proportions in the epic that is India. Centuries of leaders, sects, followers and faiths have ensured the present confusion that seems to pervade every political entity the country.No one has a clear agenda or set of beliefs, but even that is a generalisation that I overlooked while writing.

All generalisations seem to break down when the issue is as special as the idea of India.

Cattle class, etc.

'Cattle class' was talk of the town, and indeed the whole country, last week. But I don't think the man was far from the truth. For one, it is a phrase used to describe the economy class, and very apt at that. Isn't that the way we are shoved in and out of economy class airlines, railways, buses, shared autos, rickshaws, possibly every mode of transport. A seat for two can fit three, and even four, if required. Railways is an epic in itself. The berth you just reserved for yourself does not belong to you, it is government property, so it is as much yours as it is mine. Saikat, my friend from Kolkata once told me of this seat-grabbing ploy he once saw. It involved fake shit, which people would hurl through the windows of trains, so that no one would want to sit on that seat. And just think about the locals running in Mumbai. I guess cows have it way easier, moving around carefree on the boulevards of India, sans red lights, one ways, etc. I can never forget Saikat's hilarious rendition of how he travels in the locals, fighting with every other person around him, for an extra heel of space. Bring as many new trains as you might want to, introduce the metro, a/c buses; things are likely not to change.

What else... the fire alarm has been buzzing around in our apartment pretty often over the last week. For some reason, I think its due to Vinod and his cooking skills, if not his cooker. For the uninitiated, there is something gone awry about everything that Vinod does. He lost his laptop and backpack at a coffee shop in Barcelona, he worked his ass off on an internship in Finland and was given an average grade, he forgot his I 20 and still made it the US, he forgot his certificates, his cooker does not whistle.. the list is endless, and growing.

Sridhar is right with my question in the last post, it was Jean Paul Sartre who declined the Nobel on philosophical grounds. The other voluntary refusal was made by Le Duc Tho, a Vietnamese activist who refused the 1973 prize that he was jointly awarded with Henry Kissinger, because Vietnam was still not at peace.

I went to a Hay Ride today, not quite cattle class though. Had a nice time reaching the place, with Richard, my Tour of Madison guide, driving me to the place. The ride itself was no big deal, a group of people driving around in a tractor. But it was a nice time playing volleyball, meeting a lot of people and eating very good food.

We did our bi-weekly shopping yesterday, so the fridge is full. We have stocked up lots of cookies and stuff to snack up. Sankar's got a new set of Bose headphones and Sriram's advisor is coming back from Princeton in ten days.

The festive season starts in India, and I am sure to miss it dearly. As a kid, navratri would mean staying up late on the pretext of raas garba, running around with friends and getting up late in the mornings. Over the last two years, the fun reduced, but I still managed to sneak out for an evening of dance and fun. I don't know what's gonna happen here. Would be nice to get some of the festive season in India to Madison.

On Omar

Omar Abdullah comes across as a confident young man, with lots of promise in the Indian political scene that is getting younger with each passing day. However, his first stint at the helm of affairs in the perennially troubled state of J&K has been anything but smooth. Shopian, Baramulla, blah blah... stone pelting, effigy burning, etc. And the latest is the 2006 sex scandal. I am hoping that he comes out clean. Amidst all the angry outbursts, accusations and denials, Omar made a statement that has stayed with me. He said, "In this country the accused is pronounced innocent until proven guilty. However, since this is a personal attack on my morality, I hold myself guilty until proven innocent."

The man surely talks hard. It remains to be seen if he delivers as he promises.